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[April 8th, 1964] Pooooolo! (Doctor Who: Marco Polo, Parts 5 to 7)

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By Jessica Holmes

The caravan winds ever onwards across Cathay. Let’s catch up, shall we?

We’re a bit over halfway through our first historical serial, tagging along with Marco Polo as he travels across China to meet with Kublai Khan. With him are Tegana, a Mongol warlord and obvious baddie, Ping-Cho, a young lady from Samarkand on her way to be married, and of course, our Doctor and his companions. Tegana has been trying (and failing) to bump off our tag-alongs so he can nick the TARDIS for his master, Logai, a rival to the great Kublai Khan. And now a guard has just turned up dead. Could this journey be about to come to a sudden and bloody end?

RIDER FROM SHANG-TU

Our companions find the murdered guard, and are quick to raise the alarm. The men arm themselves, and prepare to fight. There’s a bandit attack coming (a gold sticker for whoever guesses who orchestrated that), and they’ll need all the fighters they can muster.

So they send the women into the tent.

On your own heads be it, lads.

The Doctor advocates taking shelter in the TARDIS, but to no avail, because Marco is just bit too stubborn for his own good. Tegana tries to convince Marco that the Doctor and his companions murdered the guard. To be fair, they did have the motive and opportunity, but what about the means?

I suppose Ian could have made use of the forgotten art of war crockery.

Marco doesn’t really listen to Tegana, so his stubbornness can be good for something, it seems.

Still, they’re going to need more than a few swords if they’re going to win against a pack of bandits. Ian comes up with the ingenious idea to throw bamboo on the fire. Bamboo is a hollow grass, so there’s air inside each stick. What happens to air when it heats up? It expands. And what happens if the grass can’t expand with it?

Pop!

The bandits turn up, and we’re treated to a bit of swashbuckling action as the battle commences. In all the hubbub, Tegana kills the leader of the bandits, sending his secret complicity to the grave with him, and the Doctor dusts off his fencing skills.

Ian’s exploding bamboo trick pays off, and the bandits scatter, leaving the caravan free to lick its wounds and get going again. The Doctor is smart enough to figure out that Tegana was in league with the bandits (well, duh), and Marco starts to warm to the companions again.

A courier from the great Khan arrives, to the surprise of everyone, for they are many, many leagues yet from Shang-Tu. He explains that he had a fresh horse waiting for him at waystations every league, and he wears bells on his clothing to let the ostlers know when he’s about to arrive, so as to waste as little time as possible.

You see, he had an extremely important message for them. A matter of grave urgency.

Kublai Khan says: Hello, how are you?

Oh. Nice of him, I suppose.

Then off we go to Cheng-Ting, the ‘white city’.

The set and costumes here are lovely. I’ll be waxing lyrical about this in a little bit.

What I will not be waxing lyrical about, however, is this fellow here, whose name I never did catch, because I was so distracted by how bizarre his intonation and mannerisms are. He’s the most pompous prat in all of China.

The Doctor’s uncharitable but accurate impression of him is very funny. So, perhaps it was deliberate.

A one eyed man, Kuiju, meets Tegana in the stables, and they strike a deal. Kuiju will steal the TARDIS for Tegana. In great trade caravans, it is so easy for things to be misplaced, after all.

I just had a thought. How heavy is the TARDIS? We saw a few additional rooms during The Edge Of Destruction, so we know that the TARDIS is at least the size of a house on the inside. So, does the weight of the TARDIS match the outer dimensions, or the inner dimensions, or both?

I’m just wondering how they’re managing to transport it. They seem not to have had any problems loading it onto the wagon, so perhaps it does only weigh as much as the outer dimensions. That’ll make it easier to steal, I suppose.

I feel like that probably breaks some law of physics. Don’t ask which. I’m not a Science Lawyer.

Well, it looks like it’s soon to be a moot point, because Ping-Cho’s stealing the keys to the TARDIS! She promised Marco that she wouldn’t reveal to the others where the keys were hidden, but she didn’t say anything about not taking them herself.

I would honestly love it if Ping-Cho came along with the companions as a permanent addition to the crew. Susan gets a friend her own age, Ping-Cho doesn’t have to marry a man old enough to be her grandfather, everybody wins!

But it’d also bring the serial to an end two episodes early, and I’m quite enjoying myself, thank you very much.

Let’s throw a Tegana in the works.

4 out of 5.

MIGHTY KUBLAI KHAN

Tegana foils the companions’ attempt to escape, and Ian ‘confesses’ to taking the key, to protect Ping-Cho. With that, the caravan moves on, and our next stop is at an inn between Cheng-Ting and Peking.

Ian tries once again to convince Marco to give the TARDIS back, and this time, he throws all caution to the wind and flat out tells him that he’s from the future, the TARDIS flies through time and space, and no, they can’t just hang about and get a ship back home from Venice.

Marco, though having seen some wild things in his travels across the far east (like a burning black stone!), has to draw the line somewhere, and the notion of travelling freely between tomorrow, today and yesterday is about a hundred leagues over that line.

What’s more, Marco figures out that Ian lied about stealing the key, and deduces that the only reason he would lie is to protect the real thief: Ping-Cho, who is nowhere to be found.

She has slipped out and is now making her less-than-merry way back to Samarkand, so Ian offers to ride back to look for her.

Ian, can you actually ride a horse? I mean really, properly ride a horse? No, plodding along the beach on a donkey when you’re holidaying in Blackpool doesn’t count.

Ping-Cho makes it back to the way station, and runs into Kuiju as he puts his scheme into action, posing as an envoy from the Khan and tricking that pompous official into letting him take possession of the TARDIS. Oh, and while he’s at it, he scams Ping-Cho out of all her money when she tries to book passage to Samarkand with his caravan.

Nice chap.

Just when it seems Ping-Cho is royally stuffed, along comes Ian! And with the arrival of the real envoy from Shang-Tu, it doesn’t take anyone long to realise that the TARDIS has been stolen.

I think I’d have really liked Ian if he’d been one of my teachers. In another life he’d have been a hero in one of those old adventure serials. Ergo, a cool teacher.

Ian figures the TARDIS is most likely being taken on the road to Karakorum, which was the capital of Genghis Khan’s empire, though by now it’s little more than a field. The Mongols were, and still are, a nomadic people, after all. Their cities don’t tend to stay in one place.

Meanwhile, in Shang-Tu, the companions have finally arrived!

The set for the summer palace is gorgeous. Throughout this serial the sets have been impressive, and the palaces are sublimely ornate. I’ve managed to procure a few colour images taken from production, so as we can see they’re even more beautiful when not viewed on a monochrome television set. The level of detail and care that’s gone into every inch of the production certainly shows, and sells the palace as the splendid heart of this mighty empire.

Still, for all the majesty of the Yuan dynasty, the Doctor isn’t about to kowtow to some puny Earth ruler. He has a bad back, anyway. Perhaps he should try a curtsey?

And now, dear readers.

The moment you’ve been waiting for.

Enter the mighty Kublai Khan!

Were you expecting him to come galloping in on horseback or something? That’s more his grandfather’s style. Kublai Khan is, as Marco Polo notes, ‘the greatest administrator the world has ever seen’, which is a weird boast, but I’ll take his word for it. His vizier is a bit uptight, but the Khan turns out to get along with the Doctor quite well, and it’s not long before the pair potter off to have a soothing bath in the local healing waters.

Back at the way station, Ping-Cho and Ian track down Kuiju (and also the TARDIS), and at knife-point the thief admits that Tegana paid him to steal the ‘caravan’.

And speak of the devil, here he comes!

3.5 out of 5. Nothing extraordinary, but not bad.

ASSASSIN AT PEKING

The confrontation turns deadly when Kuiju ends up on the wrong end of a knife, and moments later the courier from Shang-Tu arrives. Tegana claims Ian was trying to steal the ‘caravan’, Ian claims Tegana was plotting against the Khan, and the courier, having just come to deliver a message and being far too busy to play judge, more or less throws up his hands and says it’s up to the Khan, who has left Shang-Tu for Peking.

Speaking of Peking, we have a lovely set once again. I don’t know much about Chinese art, so I couldn’t say for sure if it’s appropriate to the right period of Chinese history, or whether it’d be like seeing a Norman Rockwell painting in George Washington’s study.

Period accurate or not, it sure does look pretty.

The Doctor and the Khan are getting along happily, drinking tea and playing backgammon. Oh, and betting colossal amounts of lands, goods and chattel on the outcome. I think the Doctor owns about half of the empire now. What’s more, the Doctor seems to have got over his aversion to bowing, as he manages just fine when the Empress shows up.

Lovely costumes once more. Very pretty fabric and some lovely cuts, as can be expected of Chinese textiles.

However.

They’re the wrong period.

Yes, they’re Chinese. They look very authentic. Some nice, authentic, Qing dynasty clothing. The Qing dynasty was last in power in 1912. The last Qing Emperor is actually still alive.

This serial is set during the Yuan dynasty, which ended in 1368. Oh, and we have the entire Ming dynasty separating these two periods.


Courtesy ofWikimedia Commons

This fresco, dated to the Yuan dynasty, shows some differences in the style of clothing. What jumps out to me most are the abundance of flowing fabrics and wrapped robes fastened with a belt. I could be wrong, but the costumes just don’t look like Yuan dynasty clothes to me.

I can’t claim any expertise but I think this might be comparable to seeing Charlemagne in a ruff.

The betting heats up when the Doctor asks to put up the TARDIS as stakes in their game. It’s a big risk, but it might be his best chance of reclaiming his ship. The Khan, however, would much rather he took something a bit less valuable, like the island of Sumatra.

I’m fairly certain that’s not yours to give, Kublai. Do you even have a navy? From what I know of the Mongols they were more into land-based empire building. Horses don’t do all that well on water.

Along comes Marco, and shortly after Ian turns up with Tegana and Ping-Cho, and I will give you three guesses as to whose accounting of events the court sides with. Because of course, Tegana is a Mongol, and Ian is not.

Oh, and Ping-Cho is getting married tomorrow. Now, I think weddings are great. Everyone has fun and you get free cake. But I’m also a big fan of this neat concept called ‘consent’ which seems to be glaringly absent in this marriage. Poor Ping-Cho.

Marco finally admits that laying claim to the TARDIS was wrong of him, but what’s done is done, and Kublai won the game of backgammon anyway.

A sentence ago I said ‘poor Ping-Cho’, but it looks like she’s in luck! Her husband-to-be? A little less so.

Her fiancé, so excited to get to spend the rest of his life with his pretty young bride, decided to try and extend his time on Earth with an ‘Elixir of Life’.

…Made of sulfur and quicksilver.

Something similar happened to the first Qin emperor, and the first man to unify China, Qin Shi Huang, who took mercury pills in the hopes he would live forever.

He did not live forever.

Ping-Cho is much relieved at the old man’s death, though she is smart enough not to be too open about that fact. She does, however, decide to stay in the court of Kublai Khan. Who knows, perhaps she’ll meet someone nice. It’s a bit too convenient for my liking, but still a nice little nod to Chinese history.

Marco, however, is feeling defeated. His gift didn’t work and the Khan no longer trusts him. It looks like Tegana’s won.

Good for him, but what does he want? What is Tegana’s game? Logai, his master, could attack Peking, but Kublai’s superior numbers would surely crush him.

But what is an army without a leader? Kublai is an old man, after all. It wouldn’t be hard to kill him. Especially if you’re a strong young warlord who has been welcomed into the city with open arms.

Oh, dear.

Realising the danger, the companions rush to the Khan’s chambers, warning Marco along the way, just as a messenger arrives and informs them that as they feared, Logai’s army is marching on Peking!

In the throne room, the Khan narrowly escapes death when Tegana kills his vizier by mistake, and it buys him just enough time for Marco and company to arrive, and we at last get the duel we’ve been waiting for, a thrilling clash of steel, a dance of blades, between the warlord and the explorer.

Marco succeeds in disarming Tegana, but before he can be brought to justice, Tegana grabs a guard’s sword and falls upon it, and all his schemes, along with the man himself, come to naught and slump onto the throne room floor.

With Tegana defeated, Marco hands the Doctor the keys to his TARDIS. Everyone says a hasty farewell, and the companions pile in, with the ship vanishing into the ether a moment later as the court looks on in astonishment.

Marco apologises to the Khan for giving away the gift from under his nose, but the Khan shrugs and quips that the Doctor would only have won it back in a game of backgammon anyway. Still, it’ll be quite a tale to tell everyone back in Venice. That is, assuming anyone believes it.

Well, poor old Marco Polo had great trouble convincing any of his contemporaries that most of what he wrote was true. Even the bit about seeing unicorns. Look it up.

4.5 out of 5, largely for the swordfight.

CONCLUSION

So, that was Marco Polo. I quite enjoyed our journey across China, though the serial is not without its flaws. It drags in places, I began to find everyone’s obliviousness to Tegana’s obvious scheming quite irritating after a while (the perils of invoking dramatic irony), and as I noted last time there’s the disappointing casting choices, along with I think some issues of historical accuracy when it comes to design. Also, the ending is a bit abrupt.

However, this is the most impressive production the Doctor Who team have put on for us yet, bringing the grandeur of a Hollywood epic to the small screen. It’s not quite Cleopatra in terms of scale (or budget), but I definitely feel a similar sense of ambition in this story of great journeys, great rulers and great treachery.

All in all? Well worth the watch, and more of this sort of thing, please and thank you.

THE SCORE

Now, the maths says (factoring in the score I forgot to include for The Wall Of Lies) that this serial gets a 3.57, but I’m feeling generous, and because of the quality of the latter half I’ll be nice and bump it up to a 4.

4 out of 5 stars

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TV

[March 25, 1964] The Face of Terror (The Twilight Zone, Season 5, Episodes 20-24)

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by Natalie Devitt

The quality of the episodes on The Twilight Zone has been pretty inconsistent this past month. One thing that did remain constant was that most of the main characters found themselves in some pretty frightening situations. The month’s entries include a story about a young woman being chased by a stranger dressed in black, a man waiting for his execution, a journalist interviewing an actress who may be keeping a deadly secret, and a man discovering that his television set shows his infidelities for his wife to see.

Spur of the Moment, by Richard Matheson

A young woman named Anne, portrayed by Diana Hyland (who you may have seen on Alfred Hitchcock Presents) goes horseback riding on the grounds of her family’s sprawling estate in Spur of the Moment. While out riding, “a strange nightmarish woman in black” riding a black horse appears, looking down on Anne from on top of a hill. The lady lets out a scream. Then, Anne is chased on horseback by the older woman wearing a long black cloak. She shouts out Anne’s name and begs her to stop, but the woman’s pleas fall on deaf ears as Anne rides to the safety of her home.

Once inside, a disheveled Anne tells her parents and her fiancé about the woman. She cries, “I think if she caught me, she would have killed me.“ In the role of her mother is Marsha Hunt, who just appeared in The Outer Limit’s episode ZZZZZ. Anne’s mother assures her that the whole thing must be a misunderstanding, while Anne’s fiancée, Robert, jokes that the whole incident could be “a warning” to her to cancel their upcoming nuptials.

Just then the bride-to-be is visited by her ex-fiancée, David. He tells Anne, “Break your engagement. You broke ours.“ Anne’s father (Philip Ober of From Here to Eternity) forces David to leave by gunpoint. With this many bad omens, will Robert and Anne’s wedding go on as planned?

Spur of the Moment has so much potential that it never seems to totally fulfill. The premise is interesting enough, even with the identity of the woman in black being pretty easy to figure out. The real twist is actually much less predictable and quite good. That said, the screenplay could have used a little more character development because most of the characters are pretty one-dimensional. This is especially true when it comes to Anne, who is obnoxious and entitled.

In addition to the screenplay, the episode is marred by over-acting by otherwise decent actors. Then there is the makeup used to age some of the actors, which is a bit of a distraction. As much as I wanted to love this episode with its striking image of the lady with the black cape on the stallion, two and a half stars is all I can give to Spur of the Moment.

An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge, by Robert Enrico

An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge is as the opening monologue announces, “a film shot in France” and it is Robert Enrico’s adaptation of Ambrose Bierce’s classic short story by the same name. Playing Peyton Farquhar is French actor Roger Jacquet. Peyton is about to be hung by Union soldiers during the Civil War. Prior to his scheduled hanging at Owl Creek Bridge, Peyton looks back on his life, thinking mainly of his family. Somehow as Peyton is falling from the bridge, his noose miraculously snaps and he falls into the water below. Peyton swims away, narrowly escaping the soldiers. He then travels through the woods in order to be reunited with his loved ones, or does he?

An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge is easily the most impressive episode this month. As Peyton is escaping, the audience see things from Peyton’s perspective, watching his senses grow stronger and he notices everything around him. Visually, this is episode is incredibly ambitious. There is underwater photography, and nature shots that appear to employ a wide variety of camera lenses and filters. The episode also uses quite a few different type of camera shots with plenty to stare at in each and every shot.

There is not much dialogue in this short film, but what little spoken word that is used really helps to put the viewer in Peyton‘s place. This includes an exchange between the Union men, which is slowed down as they try unsuccessfully to catch him. There is also the sound of birds chirping and Peyton’s watch ticking. An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge is a far cry from your usual television fare; this 1962 Cannes Film Festival winner for Best Short Subject screams European art house cinema. It is a fantastic episode, even if aside from the conclusion, it seems a little bit out of place with the series. In any case, the episode earns its five stars.

Queen of the Nile, by Charles Beaumont

In Queen of the Nile, Ann Blyth of Mildred Pierce plays “Pamela Morris, renowned movie star, whose name is a household word and whose face is known to millions.” Lee Philips, who last appeared on The Twilight Zone in the haunting Passage on the Lady Anne, plays cynical reporter Jordan; he has an appointment to interview the ageless actress at her mansion.

During the interview, he notices some other things. Despite more than 20 years passing since she was painted in one of her portraits on display in the house, she looks exactly the same. He cannot resist the urge to ask her, “Just how old are you?” She tells him that, “A woman in my position can’t afford to have any secrets.” After playing some games, she claims to be 38. But in order for that to be true, she would have had to have made some of her biggest pictures when she was a small child, which would have meant that she was too young to have made her 1940 breakout performance in Queen of the Nile.

Later, he learns that there were two Queen of the Nile movies, one of which was made during the silent era. The actress in the original died in a tragic accident and her replacement looked remarkably similar to the Pamela Morris. Is it possible that Pamela Morris really starred in both films and has not aged a single day in all in the years since? If so, what is her secret staying so youthful?

Queen of the Nile not is not terribly creative or deep. Everyone ages around Pamela while she stays the same, like some sort of Dorian Gray character. We have all seen similar stories countless times. In fact, The Twilight Zone’s Long Live Walter Jameson had one such story. Luckily, the acting and overall execution adds credibility to this television equivalent of a B movie. Simply put, Queen of the Nile is entertaining, which is why it receives three stars.

What’s in the Box, by Martin Goldsmith

What’s in the Box tells the story of a couple that hires a new repairman to fix their television set. Rod Serling calls the man “factory-trained, prompt, honest.” Academy Award nominee Joan Blondell plays Phyllis, who has her suspicions about her husband’s faithfulness. Once the repairman finishes the job, her husband Joe, played by fellow Academy Award nominee William Demarest notices the television is showing what he thought were private moments with his mistress.

In the meantime, he tries to prevent Phyllis from watching the television. Not long after, he notices that the television has begun showing recent arguments with his wife. Thinking his wife is responsible, he begins to ask her questions: “Are you sure you never saw that repair guy before?” She calls him “cracked.” Unfortunately for Joe, things continue to get worse and the television begins predicting the couple’s future conflicts.

What’s in the Box revisits some of the ideas explored in the previous episode, A Most Unusual Camera. This time around, the story had some incredibly annoying characters played by extremely talented actors in what is probably the most depressing entry since Uncle Simon. The episode lacked sympathetic characters and even the faintest glimmer of hope. Two stars is all I can give to What’s in the Box.

This month on The Twilight Zone featured characters in some terrifying circumstances. Perhaps the most shocking thing is how much the quality of the episodes vary these days. Two entries were enjoyable. As for the remaining two offerings, one had potential and the other was a bit of a disappointment. At this point, I think it is safe to say that we are witnessing the last gasps of a once great series.

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TV

[March 15th, 1964] Maaaarco! (Doctor Who: Marco Polo, Parts 1 to 4)

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By Jessica Holmes

Welcome back, everyone. Get comfy, because this is our first proper historical episode. This means that I’m about to go off on about a dozen different tangents before we’re done.

(I'd like to note that I was having some difficulty with my television set whilst watching this episode, so if I seem to have missed anything, that's why, and I apologise in advance.)

I must admit that I didn't know much about the historical Marco Polo going in, so I've gone along with my notes to the library and examined the facts in order to compare them to the episode, and see if there are any slip-ups. Other than obviously no time travellers in a phone box turning up halfway in.

THE ROOF OF THE WORLD

In which the companions find themselves in the Himalayas, but soon discover they are not alone. Are they about to fall victim to the terrible Yeti? No, it's the Mongols! And who should be with them but Marco Polo himself.

With the TARDIS in need of repairs, Marco invites the companions to travel with him to Shang-Tu, where he plans to meet with the great Kublai Khan himself. Also accompanying him are Ping-Cho, a young lady of around Susan's age who is on her way to be married (!), and Tegana, a Mongol warlord.

Ping-Cho, as far as I can tell, is not a real historical figure; however Marco Polo did once escort a wedding party from China to Persia, so this could perhaps have been the inspiration for her character. Tegana isn’t real, either, though Marco Polo probably would have travelled with Mongols of high status like Tegana many times, being something of a favourite of the court.

We get our first dose of educational entertainment when not long into the episode, Barbara, being the history teacher, explains to Susan who Marco Polo is.

For anybody unaware, Marco Polo was one of the earliest European travellers to document his travels across Asia. In his lifetime, and for a good long time afterwards, many doubted the veracity of his claims, but we now know that much of what he wrote was indeed accurate. He spent many years at the court of the leader of the Mongols, Kublai Khan, grandson of the legendary Genghis Khan. Did you know that Genghis Khan simply means 'great leader'? That's how highly the Mongols thought of him, that even today we don't refer to him by his true name (which, for those curious, was Temujin).

Basically, Kublai Khan had a hell of a legacy to live up to. Genghis Khan may have carved out the empire, but going by the records, Kublai made it truly great. Fabulously rich, high education rates, freedom of religion. If you ignore the truly biblical death rate, the Mongol Empire was rather amazing. Still, a lot of people died to make it happen.


And their yurts look very cosy, too.

Not a minute later, Ian steps in to fulfil his role as a science teacher, when he explains to Marco Polo why the water is boiling at a lower temperature than it should: because they are at high altitude and the air pressure is low. Indeed, the low air pressure is also causing the Doctor to suffer from altitude sickness. He doesn’t go into the mechanics of why, but that’s perhaps beyond the scope of the show.

While certainly educational, and fulfilling the stated goal of Doctor Who as a programme, these little bits of educational exposition do feel a bit jarring and clunky, as if the show suddenly remembers it’s supposed to be edifying.

Travelling with Marco soon proves to be a bad idea when he informs the time travellers of his true intentions. He's going to present their TARDIS as a gift to the Khan in hopes that the Khan will see fit to release him from his service.

Oh, and to make matters worse, Tegana is planning to poison everyone and take the TARDIS for himself.

At this point it would be remiss of me not to bring up the casting of this serial. I have to say…I'm disappointed.

I am disappointed that more people of Chinese or Mongolian heritage were not cast in speaking roles. I know that casting actors of one ethnicity and putting them in heavy makeup to look like another ethnicity is pretty much par for the course in the current film and television industries. It’s not even unusual for the BBC. Just tune in during Saturday evening primetime and you’ll see what I mean.

I had hoped that Doctor Who might make more of an effort to cast authentically, but alas, most of the Asian characters in this serial are portrayed by actors of no Asian heritage. After all, isn’t speculative fiction supposed to go against the status quo, not uphold it? It’s a real missed opportunity.

Three and a half out of five.

THE SINGING SANDS

In this honestly pretty dull episode, the caravan winds its way across the Gobi desert, the Doctor spends the entire time sulking, the girls get lost in a sandstorm while tailing Tegana, who for some reason changes his mind about his plan. Rather than poisoning the water gourds, like he said he was going to do, he just slashes them open and hopes everyone will die of thirst.

Why?

I don't really know.

Two and a half out of five.

FIVE HUNDRED EYES

The caravan makes it to Tun-Huang and the plot starts getting interesting again.


Ping-Cho tells us a story.

We get a little bit of linguistic history, which is a bit of history I am fond of because I'm that sort of a person. Never end up alone with me at a party. When I start talking, I don't stop. You've probably read enough of my articles by now to have gathered that.

Anyway, it's in the telling of the tale of the hashshashin, though quite heavily mythologised. The hashshashin were an Islamic sect present from the eleventh to thirteenth centuries in what is today Iran, roughly speaking. They were known for fighting their enemies in a most unconventional way: with espionage, assassinations and psychological warfare. Oh, and for smoking a drug called hashish, which is a resin derived from the cannabis plant. Everyone who can spot the potential etymological link please raise your hands.

So, Ping-Cho regales the group with the tale of a wicked lord named Aladdin who lived in the mountains and gave his men a powerful drug which made them feel rather marvellous, and all they had to do for him in return was go out and kill people for him.

This is not exactly how it went but it's a very interesting group with an intricate history. Also I can't find out who this Aladdin is, or who he's meant to be.

Following the not-entirely-accurate history lesson (you should probably pick up a book on the Assassins, more formally known as the Nizari Ismailis; they were an fascinating bunch), Barbara tails him to the eponymous cave of five hundred eyes, where she gets caught, and also the budget suddenly runs out, for this ‘cave’ looks an awful lot like it’s made of plywood.


Tegana, on the hunt for the budget.

The girls are quick to notice Barbara's absence however, and rush to tell the Doctor, who, having had a marked change for the better in terms of personality following his brief absence, immediately sets out with them to find her. Could it be that the Doctor is learning to care about…other PEOPLE?

I think I might faint.

Three and a half out of five. 

THE WALL OF LIES

Marco learns what the others have been up to, and rushes to the cave. He is the one to save Barbara's life, but he's cross at her for putting herself in that position, and at the others for sneaking off without telling him. What's more, he doesn't believe that the girls were following Tegana at all, for Tegana denies having ever been to the cave before.

Tegana is has long been poisoning Marco's mind against our companions, and it seems to be taking root when he orders that the girls be separated. I really enjoyed the relationship between the girls. It feels very natural, and it's lovely to see Susan having a friend her own age. These girls are from different times and cultures entirely, but they get along like two peas in a pod.

The caravan pushes ever onward, and in the city of Sin-Ju (A city which I can’t seem to find out anything about. The name doesn’t come up anywhere that I can find.), Ping-Cho tries to prove to Marco that Tegana lied about having been to the cave before the group rescued Barbara, when he asked earlier about a passageway. It's important to note that this passageway is in fact a secret passageway, which is of course about ten times cooler than any other passageway.

Marco scoffs at her evidence and gets rather cross with her, trusting Tegana over her, even though Tegana might as well walk around with I AM UP TO NO GOOD tattooed on his forehead.
Speaking of Tegana, he's now plotting, yet again, to kill all the travellers. This guy is so rubbish at plotting it's unbelievable. I could have killed all these people five times over by the time we got to this point.

Don't believe me? Let’s go through them right now.

  1. Back in the desert, I could have poisoned the water gourds. You know. Like Tegana said he was going to do and then didn’t.
  2. I could have slashed the gourds open and taken the last entirely for myself, and ridden off to the oasis, there to relax and sip water while the others die. After all, this plan almost worked, only they managed to drink a bit of condensation from the TARDIS. That wouldn’t have been enough if they didn’t have that last water gourd.
  3. Assuming I didn't poison the water, I could have poisoned any of the meals. Then again, everyone does eat the same thing. Also then again, I could just go without one meal. Better hungry than dead, right?
  4. Tegana has a sword. A very sharp sword. Wait until everyone is asleep, tiptoe about, kill them one by one. Nobody gets a chance to fight back. Simple.
  5. The capture of Barbara was the ideal opportunity to bait the others into an ambush.

In conclusion, Tegana is absolutely rubbish at murder plots, and nobody should have me as a travelling companion. Especially not if you’re prone to snoring.

What he is good at, however, is getting Marco to turn against the Doctor and his companions, who become prisoners rather than guests.

Not that that’s going to stop Ian cutting his way out of captivity. With plates!

I was mildly disappointed when it turned out he meant literally cutting his way out of the tent with shards of ceramic, as opposed to taking on the guards armed with a set of fine china. But shock, horror, as Ian goes to subdue the guard, it turns out that someone's beaten him to it!

I'm not saying it was Tegana…
But it was definitely Tegana.
And if he can't manage to kill them next time, I'll just be embarrassed on his behalf.

CONCLUSION

So, that was the first half (ish) of Marco Polo! We’ve travelled a long, long way over these last few episodes.

One thing I do have to commend about this serial is its ambition. It's clear this is where most of the cost-cutting on previous episodes went, with far more detailed sets and some wonderful costumes. I also enjoyed our foray into real history, with real people, and I am really looking forward to meeting Kublai Khan. The Mongol Empire was a real marvel, and I am excited to see more of it. 

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[March 11, 1964] Brought into Focus (The Outer Limits, Season 1, Episodes 21-24)

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by Natalie Devitt

Last month’s episodes of The Outer Limits really raised the bar for the series. The newest batch of stories are mostly good, but do not quite meet last month‘s contributions to the series. This month, many characters make some pretty important realizations. Episodes include a story about young man who finds out the real identity of his father after being accused of a heinous crime, a group of scientists that learn some pretty scary things about a plant that they discover in space, amusement park attendees who find out first hand that a spaceship simulator ride is really equipped to handle space travel, and a team of scientists that discover the contents of a moonstone.

The Children of Spider County, by Anthony Lawrence

In The Children of Spider County, “four of the most magnificent and promising young minds in the country suddenly disappear off the face of the Earth.” All of these young men have a lot in common. Not only are they all smart, but they are “physically superior.“ They were born during the same month of the same year in a little place called Spider County. The men also share the same middle name, Aros, a planet in another galaxy. Each one was born prematurely and does not know his father.

The fifth and final member of this group, Ethan, is the only one not missing and he is behind bars, accused of murder. Ethan is played by Lee Kinsolving, who just starred in Twilight Zone’s Black Leather Jackets. Ethan has been having strange dreams of a creature from outer space following him. Turns out, he is being followed by an extraterrestrial, who is also his long lost father.

His father, Aabel, is played by Kent Smith, who appeared in Val Lewton's Cat People. Ethan’s father helps his son escape the police. Aabel warns Ethan that, “Fear, suspicion and ignorance will sentence you to die, not facts.” He offers to take him “home” to Aros, where he can be with others that are like him in a place “where superstition and fear can never reach you.” Meanwhile, an investigator is trying to get to the bottom of the “abductions by representatives of an alien planet.”

In this episode, Aable has an interesting appearance. For starters, he always wears a suit. Also, he switches between looking like a human and an alien (thus fulfilling in two senses The Outer Limits' trademark of featuring a "man in a suit"). A trait of Ethan’s father that I did not particularly enjoy was his penchant for very long monologues. Luckily, most of the speeches were followed by action, picking up the pace. One thing this entry does have going for it is the way it is photographed; the director of photography, Kenneth Peach, uses anything from Dutch angles to birds-eye views to really create the mood for the episode. The Children of Spider County was intriguing, but it was just too uneven to really be satisfying, which is why it earns two and a half stars.

Specimen: Unknown, by Stephen Lord

Men aboard a space station in Specimen: Unknown discover small mushrooms-shaped objects. The episode stars western actor Stephen McNally and Come Back, Little Sheba ‘s Richard Jaeckel. Also, Gail Kobe, who recently appeared in The Twilight Zone’s The Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross is another performer in Specimen: Unknown. Thinking that the objects are “dormant spores,” the crew members take them to their lab and put them underneath a heat lamp, where the objects quickly grow into large plants with flowers. In the lab, the flowers begin to spray “some kind of vapor,” killing a member of the crew.

Worried about bringing the deceased member home to Earth and possibly spreading the illness to others, the crew disposes of his body in space. Following the funeral, a member of the crew notices another “mushroom thing” attached to the space station. He decides to study it, completely unaware that it is the same type of plant that is responsible for his colleague’s tragic death. Not surprisingly, the plant grows much quicker than anyone could have ever anticipated and it starts “shooting off spores.”

They isolate the “alien plant life” and store it in metal storage containers, where they believe that plant will no longer pose a threat any humans. That is, until said containers are accidentally tipped over and the alien plants are once again able to start releasing more spores in the air, which leads to a number of the men falling ill with the “alien virus.” With a crew this oblivious, will they be able outwit these plants from outer space and stop the illness that they spread?

Specimen: Unknown seems to have been heavily influenced by The Day of the Triffids. That said, one of the things the episode has going for is its space creatures, which offer a nice break from the usual men in monsters suits. I know objectively, this far from the best entry in the series. I mean, the plants seem to be much more intelligent than just any of the people in the episode. But if you like schlock as much as I do, then Specimen: Unknown is kind of fun. That is why I am giving the episode three stars.

Second Chance, by Lin Dane and Lou Morheim

Employees and attendees at an amusement park realize that a spaceship simulator attraction is really capable of space travel in Second Chance. Actor Don Gordon (Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross) makes another appearance in The Outer Limits as the simulator‘s operator, Dave. Simon Oakland, who everyone has seen in anything from The Twilight Zone to Psycho is completely unrecognizable as the episode’s extraterrestrial, Empyria. He has been watching over the attraction, studying human behavior and preparing it for just the right time to make his journey back into space.

For the trip, Empyria wants company for so he can have assistance with setting up a colony is space. He walks around the park, passing out free tickets for the ride, pretending to be a employee in character, intentionally picking people “who would have the least regret, and would have the most to gain in a new chance in a new undistorted world,” telling people things like, the “universe may be just the place to go and start over.“ But shortly after taking over the attraction, Empyria realizes he does not know humans as well as he thinks he does.

I am not totally sure I am convinced of Empyria’s reasoning for abducting the people, but I really liked this episode. Empyria had a lot of great one-liners. The sequences involving him hiding in the simulator and sneaking around the park were pretty creepy, but it is really the acting that made the story work. Also, everything from the set design and the costumes were great, too. Second Chance was easily the most fun I had watching The Outer Limits this past month, so I give it three and a half stars.

Moonstone, by William Bast

Ruth Roman of Strangers on a Train stars as part of a team of scientists exploring the moon’s surface, who discover a “mysterious moonstone.” The sphere-shaped stone is examined. During the examination, a laser that is said to be so strong that “it can drill holes in diamonds“ has no effect on the moonstone. They assume that it must be made of metal and be used for “collecting data for transmission to Earth” by the Russians.

As it turns out, the moonstone does not belong to the Russians; on the side of the stone are eyeballs that appear and watch everything. Inside the moonstone are aliens that became stranded while trying to flee their tyrannical government that wants to use them for their knowledge. There is not much time before the aliens will be forced to return home. Until then, everyone has to decide what they are willing to sacrifice to make sure that esoteric knowledge does not end up in the wrong hands.

Moonstone has a few of storylines going. The storyline with the aliens is pretty solid. There is also a romantic subplot and some workplace drama that I did not find quite as compelling. In addition to the storylines, the set design and the paintings used for exterior shots of the moon’s surface were quite stunning. The moonstone with eyeballs floating around was really pretty creative. Overall, I would say that Moonstone deserves three stars.

It was another mostly strong month on The Outer Limits, filled with some pretty creative discoveries. With rumors having been confirmed of Twilight Zone's cancellation, The Outer Limits is probably guaranteed another season.

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[February 29, 1964] Think Twice — it's not all right (The Twilight Zone, Season 5, Episodes 17-20)

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by Natalie Devitt

The characters in the most recent month of The Twilight Zone certainly encountered plenty of doubt and hesitation when they asked for help or tried to express themselves. Such entries include the family of a young woman encouraging her to get a life-altering procedure against her wishes, a teenage girl’s alien boyfriend not receiving the help he needs when he tries to warn her that aliens plan to poison the water supply, an aging spinster struggling to get people to believe that she has been receiving a series of creepy calls, and a man who is so desperate he takes the advice of a computer to get one very special woman to acknowledge his existence.

Number 12 Looks Just Like You, by Charles Beaumont and John Tomerlin

Number 12 Looks Just Like You offers a glimpse of what the year 2000 might look like. In this futuristic society, "science has developed the means to give everyone the face and body he dreams of." A young woman by the name of Marilyn, played by Collin Wilcox of To Kill a Mockingbird, is approaching her 19th birthday. She is also being pressured by her loved ones to mark the occasion with a certain rite of passage, which includes selecting a new body out of a handful of options, like she’s ordering one from a catalog. Then, undergo a procedure to transform into her new self. She is told, "The transformation is the most marvelous thing that could happen to a person." Still, she has her concerns.

Several people in this society, while attractive, look identical and everyone wears name tags so nobody confuses any of the doppelgangers. I am sure it is no coincidence that Marilyn shares a name with one of the silver screen’s most iconic beauties. Her mother, portrayed by model Suzy Parker, asks, "What’s so terrible about being beautiful? After all, isn’t everybody?" Marilyn argues that that is exactly the problem: "Is that good, being like everybody? Isn’t that the same as being nobody?"

A family member refers to her reservations about the procedure as "radical ideas" and she is also described as being a "sick girl." To make matters worse, her beliefs echo things her father said shortly before taking his own life. Can Marilyn continue to resist the intense pressure to conform?

Number 12 Looks Just Like You is good, but not excellent. It kind of feels like a lesser version of a previous entry of The Twilight Zone, Eye of the Beholder. Collin Wilcox really becomes her character, who is significantly younger than she is in real life. Then there is the episode’s conclusion, which is incredibly frightening and is probably the episode’s greatest strength. Overall, I would say that Number 12 Looks Just Like You deserves a pretty solid three stars.

Black Leather Jackets, by Earl Hamner Jr.

In Black Leather Jackets, a biker gang rides into a sleepy town wearing, you guessed it, Black Leather Jackets. Despite some similarities, Black Leather Jackets is hardly The Wild One — the three men are not members of your ordinary biker gang. In fact, they are aliens with telekinetic powers. The aliens set up shop in a vacant house. Upon the gang’s arrival, the neighbors are hardly welcoming. One of them, Stu, portrayed by Western regular Denver Pyle, describes them as, "strange type for this neighborhood." Shelly Fabares of The Donna Reed Show plays his teenage daughter, Ellen, who Stu warns to steer clear of the gang.

It is not long after the bikers move in that the electricity in Stu’s house begins turning on and off, and Ellen’s radio picks up some strange voices. While trying to determine the cause, Stu notices a large antenna on the roof of the gang‘s house. He thinks he may have found the cause of his family‘s problems, and he decides to pay their house a visit.

As it turns out, the men are much more threatening than he ever could have imagined. They are spying on others and are receiving broadcasts of orders from their alien leader. Orders to release a deadly bacteria into the water supply in order to kill Earth’s population so they can colonize the planet. The bikers erase Stu’s memories of visiting their house and send him home in a trance. He describes the men as "three very nice boys" and no longer suspects them of being responsible for the family’s poor reception.

Shortly after, a member of the group, Scott, performed by Golden Globe Nominee Lee Kinsolving, becomes romantically involved with Ellen, much to the gang’s dismay. They are ordered by their boss to "continue without him," even though he is involved with a member of a "stupid race." Scott urges Ellen to leave town and he offers to take her to safety. He warns, "Everything alive is going to be dead," but not surprisingly, he does not exactly get the help he needs.

It is worth noting that Black Leather Jackets has a plot that is remarkably similar to Teenagers from Outer Space, but is not nearly as enjoyable as the movie. Despite looking slicker than Teenagers, Black Leather Jackets is only mildly entertaining, and often unintentionally funny. The actors did an adequate job, but it is a shame that they did not have very good source material. The screenplay is hardly Earl Hamner, Jr. at his best. I did, however, enjoy Nathan Van Cleave’s jazzy score for the episode. So, I would say that this episode deserves two and a half stars.

Night Call, by Richard Matheson

Gladys Cooper makes yet another memorable appearance on The Twilight Zone with Night Call. It has not even been a year since her last performance in the enjoyable Passage on the Lady Anne. Cooper plays Elva, a disabled and elderly woman, who lives alone. One rainy night during a storm, her phone rings. When she answers, all she hears is silence. Immediately after, she receives another call with even more silence.

Elva contacts the phone company, hoping to get to root of the problem. She is informed that during the storm, some wires had fallen. Elva is told that the unusual calls could have been the result of someone to reach her or someone else on her party line during the storm. Elva continues to receive calls, which grow increasingly strange, including calls with moaning and a man saying, "Hello." She tells her caretaker, Margaret, about the calls. Unfortunately, Margaret acts like she suspects Elva is going senile.

The phone company plans to send out a worker to check on the line as soon as the weather permits, but Elva fears that the company might think of her as a "nervous old biddy falling prey to my imagination." Until a worker can check on the line, she tries leaving the phone off of the hook. But as soon as she puts it back on the hook, it starts ringing again. Things continue to escalate and now the voice on the end of the line is asking, "Where are you? I want to talk with you."

Finally, the phone company contacts her tell her that the source of the problem is likely a "fallen wire on the edge of town." But they also add, "there is no way that anyone could have called from that location." So, who is contacting Elva and why? When calls are "routed directly through The Twilight Zone," anything is possible.

What’s not to like about Night Call? Sure, it does not hurt that it was written by Richard Matheson and directed by Jacques Tourneur, who is perhaps best known for his work with Val Lewton in pictures like 1942’s Cat People. Night Call is not flashy, but it is very effective. The suspense slowly builds. It is easily one of the high points of the season, perhaps of the series. Gladys Cooper is terrific, as usual. In addition, the episode’s score, while not specifically composed for the episode, helps to compliment the episode. This is especially true in the scene that reveals Elva’s caller. Night Call easily earns its four stars.

From Agnes with Love, by Bernard C. Schoenfeld

As From Agnes with Love opens with computer programmers struggling to repair Agnes, a very sophisticated and almost human computer, but sadly nobody can get her back in working. That is, until James, played my television actor Wally Cox, arrives. He is told, "She’s been out of her mind for a week." Luckily, as soon as the "master programmer" begins to work on then malfunctioning machine, she resumes normal activity.

James might excel at work, but he struggles in his love life. After working with Agnes for a while, she begins inquiring about his love life and coaching him. Leave It to Beaver’s Sue Randall plays Millie, Jame’s co-worker, who he has a pretty intense crush on. After rejecting James several times, Millie finally agrees to a dinner date.

Agnes sends James messages with dating advice, including "Agnes knows best." She lets him know that "reckless romantic approach required" in order to win over Millie. James is book smart, but often lacks common sense, so what he does not realize is that Agnes has actually set him up for failure. When things do not work out with Millie, Agnes tries to cheer him up him by sending him the message, "Millie is a square. Better girl loves you."

While From Agnes with Love is better than some other entries with a sense of humor, it still is pretty weak. So weak, in fact, that it really requires silly musical cues to remind the audience to laugh. The narrative is incredibly predictable, and the only person surprised by anything that happens is James. As much as I hate to admit it, two stars is all that I can give From Agnes with Love.

Some of characters this month were able to overcome people's doubts, others were not so lucky. The episodes this time around varied quite a bit in terms of quality. There were two very strong offerings. The remaining two were not so memorable. All in all, a hodgepodge of a month, but mostly worth the ride.

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[February 19th, 1964] The Edge Of Disappointment (Doctor Who: The Edge Of Destruction)

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By Jessica Holmes

Welcome back to your regularly scheduled ramblings on Doctor Who, folks. Let's get on with it, shall we?

Today I'm covering a shorter serial, a little two-parter set entirely aboard the TARDIS, where the ship has crashed with no apparent cause, and the crew must work out what happened to the ship and how to fix it before time runs out. With tensions running high, will the crew break apart before the ship does?

I'm making this sound much better than it turned out to be. You'll scream when you find out what the cause of all the problems is. Trust me.

THE EDGE OF DESTRUCTION

In this episode, the TARDIS lands with a bump, knocking our entire crew out cold. As they come to, one by one, it becomes clear something is very wrong with our crew. Wandering about in a daze, they appear confused at their company, as if they've forgotten the last couple of adventures, their relationship to one another, and their personalities.

Shortly after they come to, they make a startling discovery: the TARDIS doors are opening and closing by themselves. Susan begins to fear that there's something aboard the TARDIS with them.

Upon approaching the console, Susan has the most dramatic faint ever put to film. Ian ever-so-gently gives her a fireman's lift and plonks her down on a bed that can't be at all comfortable if you like to sleep in any other position than on your back. I wouldn't get along very well aboard the TARDIS, even if it is wheelchair accessible.

Susan, it seems, still feels a wee bit poorly when she wakes up, given that when Ian comes near her she threatens to stab him with a pair of scissors.


Look, we’ve all had mornings like that, haven’t we?

Now, stabbing Ian would be a rubbish idea. We like Ian. He’s nice. Susan instead screams and cries and stabs the bed, I can only imagine as punishment for it being so dreadfully uncomfortable.

As a highly responsible adult, Ian confiscates the scissors, by which I mean he leaves them lying around for Susan to pick up again.

The Doctor, bastion of logic and reason, thinks it very illogical to consider the idea that someone or something is aboard the ship with them, even though he was unconscious for a good six minutes at the start of the episode (I checked), during which the TARDIS doors were open for an uncertain amount of time, and his companions were either unconscious or highly dazed.

I don't know what planet's logic he's following, because it certainly isn't ours. If I left my front door wide open for a few minutes, I’d almost certainly end up with somebody else’s cat.

Susan returns to her bed with the pilfered pair of scissors, and when Barbara tends to her, a struggle ensues for the potentially deadly implement. Susan is still suspicious that there is something aboard the TARDIS with them, perhaps even hiding within them.

The Doctor manages to get the scanner working, which comes as a surprise, as he and Susan have been unable to touch any part of the console without suffering terrible pain up to now.

When activated, the scanner displays a sequence of images:

First, an idyllic expanse of English countryside.

The doors begin to open, and an unearthly bellow roars outside. The doors close, and we get the next image, an alien world, one that Susan and the Doctor visited recently. I would rather see that adventure than this one.

Then we see a heavily cratered planet, followed by a solar system, followed by what appears to be a galactic belt, which vanishes in a flash of white.

Ian would like an explanation too, but when he asks, the Doctor throws the question right back at him, because while he reckons the idea of something having crept aboard the TARDIS is absurd, apparently the idea that Ian would sabotage the TARDIS of his own free will is not. Why would he sabotage the TARDIS? To blackmail the Doctor into taking him home, of course!

To blackmail. The Doctor. Into taking him home. In the TARDIS. The TARDIS he has supposedly sabotaged. That TARDIS.

I feel like I'm stating the painfully, horrendously, agonisingly obvious here, but this is an absolutely rubbish blackmail plot.

Barbara also points out that it would be wildly out of character for her or Ian to perform any sort of sabotage on the TARDIS of their own free will, and then it's her turn to clutch her head and scream dramatically, because something has happened to the clock.

I think it melted.


That, or the Doctor is a fan of Salvador Dali.

Susan has a bit of a meltdown, too, while Ian looks a bit confused and checks his watch, which, funnily enough, is exactly what I did at that moment.

Once everyone has turned in for the night, the Doctor goes around checking on everyone with his mischievous chuckle, only this time it's a lot more creepy than endearing, and as he bends over the console to do… I don't know, something, somebody grabs him.


Goodness gracious me, who could it possibly be.

And here ends the first part, with the mystery not any closer to being solved, no real action being taken, and everyone being downright useless.

THE BRINK OF DISASTER

A truer episode title has never been written.

So, it turns out it was Ian trying to seize the Doctor, but not to worry, he promptly keels over, so no harm done. Not to the Doctor, anyway. Ian, on the other hand, is in deep trouble.

The Doctor now reckons Ian and Barbara want to steal the TARDIS and fly back to Earth themselves, to which I say: Pardon?

Even if Ian and Barbara were planning to commandeer the TARDIS, how in the world could they? It's not contemporary Earth technology! They could no more pilot the TARDIS than I could nick an aeroplane from the nearest R.A.F. base and fly to France.

Still, it’s enough for the Doctor to make up his mind to throw Ian and Barbara off the TARDIS.

I am frustrated. I dearly and sincerely hope that this is coming through. Because I have already seen that this programme can be much, much better than this.

An alarm goes off, alerting the Doctor to a Thing. I'm calling it a Thing because I never did quite catch what they called it. Faulticator? Faulplicator? Hot Potater? And as it turns out, literally everything is wrong.

For fear of flogging a dead horse I will not be making the obvious joke.

The central column of the console flashes and begins to move by itself The Doctor calculates that they have around ten minutes to live based upon…something, and the crew work out that the machine has been trying to tell them, through the various strange happenings aboard the ship, what the problem is, because as it turns out this funny little big ship has started to think for itself, after a fashion.

The machine could really do with working on its communication skills.

Barbara figures the power at the heart of the machine has been trying to escape— but why? It's like a wounded animal lashing out at anyone who tries to access the controls…except for the scanner.

There's an entire bit of them unravelling the sequence of the scanner images, the long and short of it being that it's representative of their journey so far. Why is the TARDIS trying to take the Doctor for a trip down memory lane? What’s drawing the energy from the core of the TARDIS? What incredible catastrophe has brought this remarkable ship to the brink of destruction?

A stuck button.

The Doctor pressed the Fast Return switch to get back home at the end of the Dalek adventure, and it got stuck.


Are you pulling my leg?

There we have it, folks. Susan nearly stabbed Ian, the Doctor almost abandoned him and Barbara, everyone completely lost their heads and it was just because a little spring was broken and a button got stuck.

So, Ian and the Doctor prise it up, fix it, and Bob's your uncle, off we go.

Yes.

It's really that simple.

So, we're all friends again, having gotten over our inexplicably odd behaviour. The Doctor says he's proud of Susan even though she contributed absolutely nothing and, might I remind you, almost stabbed both of her teachers. Back in my day that was most certainly grounds for expulsion.

Then, having still not managed to arrive on Earth, everyone goes off to play in the snow because we've all forgotten what we're doing.

And behold! Someone with very big feet has been through here.


Looks like one of my eldest brother’s footprints.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Where to begin?

I did not particularly enjoy this story.

This wasn't terrible, though. Don’t get me wrong.

It was mediocre. That's all. Just mediocre.

And I think that might be worse.

Nothing happens. Threads of mystery are half-heartedly picked up, toyed with, and then cast aside in favour of the next idea to pop into whichever character’s head, as if the narrative was being played with by a bored cat. Everyone's having mood swings, and as soon as everyone gets back into character, it's over in a few minutes, because of course it would be!

Everyone in this story was acting very strange and as if they only had a vague grasp of their characters (and on reality itself), and there was no actual cause for it, in the end. Now, a red herring is a good tool in building a mystery, but the red herring does have to have its own explanation within the story. Otherwise, it’s just characters acting weird for the sake of acting weird, and that’s not good writing. I could, if I was feeling very generous, chalk it up to concussion, but it wasn’t consistent enough for concussion, and I’m not feeling generous, so I shan’t.

It's nowhere near as good as The Daleks which I think makes it seem worse by comparison. Thank the stars it was only two episodes and I only lost about fifty minutes or so of my life watching it, plus however long I ended up spending doing the write-up.

I am confident that you will miss nothing by skipping this one. I don't really think the companions come out of this any closer than they were at the end of The Daleks. They were pretty friendly at that point, took about ten steps backwards in their relationship, then in a flash they're all best chums again. It doesn't feel organic. There isn’t enough tension remaining within the group to make the infighting seem justified, and given how nasty it got at one point, how quickly they snap back into being friends makes the whole thing seem pointless. If someone threatened to stab me with a pair of scissors, or throw me out of their car based upon some imagined slight, it’d take me a little while to start trusting them again. I think I’d have preferred it if there really was an entity on board. That would have at least been exciting. Especially if it was controlling one of the crew.

I like to end on a positive note, so I will at least say this: the Doctor admitting how proud he is of Susan was really very sweet, and it was something I'd like to see more of. Hopefully we shall do next time, when with any luck we'll find ourselves an adventure worth the watching.

1.5 out of 5 stars.




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[February 11, 1964] To Gain Ascendancy (The Outer Limits, Season One, Episodes 17-20)

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by Natalie Devitt

This past month of The Outer Limits presented more than its fair share of stories filled with aliens, insects and humans that all attempt to dominate those around them: an alien from another dimension that holds captives all in an attempt to bargain for more power to achieve his goals, a queen bee that tries to mate with a human in hopes of strengthening her species so that she can rule the world, a secret society that uses creatures to possess the bodies of government officials so that they can rise to power, and a tale about a woman’s desperate attempt to kill an alien and steal his magic shield in a quest for fame and status.

Don’t Open Till Doomsday, by Joseph Stefano

The Outer Limits goes back in time to the year 1929. Following a busy wedding day, newlyweds Mary and Harvey find themselves in their suite with all of their unopened wedding gifts. David Frankham, who was featured in The Outer Limits episode Nightmare, plays Harvey, who is drawn towards one gift in particular. Its card reads, “Don’t Open Till Doomsday.“ Curious, Harvey removes the wrapping paper to reveal a box with a hole on one side that flashes a light. He peeks inside the hole, only to suddenly vanish into thin air.

In the present day, newlyweds Viva and Gard decide to rent the same bridal suite where Harvey disappeared. Mary, played by Trouble in Paradise’s Miriam Hopkins, now owns the property which houses the bridal suite. Having grown old without Harvey, she tells the pair about him before saying that she has finally stopped expecting her “groom to return.” When the couple sets foot in the suite, they see that aside from dust and cobwebs that the room has not been touched in decades.

In fact, the wedding gifts are exactly as they were the night Mary’s groom vanished. The presents include the very box that caused Harvey‘s disappearance, which as it turns out has the ability to transport people into another dimension. This dimension is controlled by a creature from outer space that still has Harvey. Luckily for Mary, she thinks that Viva and Gard might hold the key to helping her free him.

Don’t Open Till Doomsday does not always make much sense, but that does not really matter. From howling winds to film noir lighting, the episode is all about atmosphere. As usual, Conrad Hall’s cinematography helped to make a pretty good episode all the more impressive. In addition, the episode has plenty of great performers, but it is Miriam Hopkins who really steals the show as Mary. She is almost unrecognizable, looking like a cross between Gloria Swanson’s Norma Desmond character in Sunset Boulevard and Bette Davis as the title character in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane.

With all this episode has a lot going for it, I must confess that the conclusion is a little disappointing and that the alien, while ugly, is not nearly as frightening as I would have liked. Despite some flaws, Don’t Open Till Doomsday is highly enjoyable, which is why it receives three and half stars.

ZZZZZ, by Meyer Dolinsky

In ZZZZZ, America, America’s Joanna Frank portrays a mysterious young woman by the name of Regina, who is hired as a lab assistant for an entomologist named Ben. In the role of Ben is Philip Abbott, returning to The Outer Limits after an appearance in The Borderland. Shortly after the “enchanting” brunette is hired, she is invited to stay in her employer‘s home with him and his wife, Francesca, played by Pride and Prejudice’s Marsha Hunt.

What Ben does not realize is that Regina is much more knowledgeable about bees than he is. After spending some time with the new hire, Francesca notices that something seems a little off about her. Francesca’s suspicions are confirmed when she looks out the window one day to see Regina hugging trees and licking flowers, then transforming back into her original bee form. As it turns out, Regina is actually a queen bee. Also, she is intent on mating with Ben in order to improve her species and conquer the world. But before she can do that, Regina needs to eliminate any competition she has for Ben‘s affection.

While far from a masterpiece, ZZZZZ is enjoyable. This entry in the series has an almost magical quality to it due in large part to Conrad Hall’s cinematography, which also makes the already attractive Joanna Frank even more seductive. The most striking scene is perhaps the scene where Francesca observes Regina in the garden going around from plant to plant before eventually turning into a bee. But even with all that the episode has going for it visually, the plot is fairly weak, which is interesting because the screenwriter is none other than Meyer Dolinsky, who also penned the scripts for outstanding episodes like The Architects of Fear and O.B.I.T. After taking everything into consideration, ZZZZZ earns three stars.

The Invisibles, by Joseph Stefano

The Invisibles follows a group of men, who have, as the narrator states, “never joined or been invited to join society.” But it is for that very reason that they have been recruited by an organization called the Society of Invisibles. The men are told that they are being given an opportunity to make something of their lives by being trusted “with a mission of incalculable importance.“

The Society of Invisibles plans to send them out to use their anonymity as an advantage in order to gain the access to prominent members of society, such as those found in “government and industry.” Once a potential victim’s guard is down, a member of the Society of Invisibles can use furry crab-shaped creatures that attach themselves to the unsuspecting victim‘s spine in order to control the body. With each new host, they move one step closer to their goal of world domination.

The men attend “indoctrination classes.” They are told, “You will work alone. Each man in a different city.” The men are also warned, “if you contact anyone for any reason whatsoever, you will be murdered.” What the organization does not know yet is that one of their men, Luis Spain, portrayed by Don Gordon, a recent actor on Twilight Zone’s The Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross, is a government agent.

The Invisibles is a pretty strong episode. What could be yet another story about alien possession or aliens trying to take over the world is executed extremely well. The acting is superb. Also, the screenplay leaves you never knowing which characters are trustworthy. The story keeps the pace going right until the very end, which is why I give it three and a half stars.

The Bellero Shield, by Joseph Stefano

The Bellero Shield tells the story of a young man named Richard, a scientist conducting experiments with laser beams. Richard is eager to become the successor to his family’s company, but Richard’s father has his doubts, since the company is phasing out lasers. Martin Landau returns to The Outer Limits after The Man Who Was Never Born and assumes the role of Richard. Relative newcomer, Sally Kellerman, makes her second appearance on the series and plays Richard’s wife, Judith.

One night after experimenting with his lasers, Richard steps out of his lab. What he does not know is that his lasers have attracted the attention of a alien or, as it calls himself, a “traveler.” When Judith attempts to shoot the being, he immediately puts up a shield. He insists on keeping his shield up, expecting to “remain shielded” until as he says, he knows more about weapons on Earth. Desperate to keep the family business and compelled by her own desire for fame, Judith distracts Richard, then waits for an opportunity to take a shot at the being when he is without his shield. Once she shoots the creature, she is eager to use his shield for her own gain.

The influence of Macbeth on The Bellero Shield is hard to miss, but even though this episode's screenplay does not try to hide its influences, it still stands as a great work on its own. The script is solid with a fantastic conclusion. The cast does not have a weak actor. All of these add up to The Bellero Shield deserving four stars.

An unwavering quest for power has been at the heart of all of the episodes this past month on The Outer Limits, but another thing that has been pretty consistent this month is the quality of the episodes. Most were at least good, if not excellent. I can only hope that this becomes the rule for the series rather than the exception.



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[February 3rd, 1964] And Into The Fire (Doctor Who: The Daleks | Episodes 5-7)

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By Jessica Holmes

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, in whatever time and place you happen to be. Ready for some more Doctor Who? I certainly am.

So, a super speedy recap before we get into things: the Doctor went and got himself and his companions stuck on an alien planet, and then everyone got captured and almost died of radiation poisoning. They escaped, barely, but then realised they couldn't leave because they'd left part of the TARDIS behind. So now they're going to have to go back to their captors. Well done, Doctor.

Oh, and there are some very cross pepperpots who dabble in plumbing.

THE EXPEDITION

In this episode, the companions must convince the Thals to help them reclaim a vital part of the TARDIS.

However, the Thals are so deeply opposed to violence that they won't take any aggressive action against the Daleks. What's more, the companions themselves can't agree on whether it's right to enlist the Thals in a conflict that has nothing to do with them, even if it could buy them their lives. After some shenanigans and a cruel but effective trick from Ian, Alydon manages to rally a few Thals to assist Ian and Barbara in their expedition to recover the part.

There are two big moral questions in this serial, and this episode is where they’re thrust into the spotlight: when, if ever, is it right to fight? And is it right to enlist someone else to fight your battles?

Entering the episode, the Thals have a firm answer to the first question: never.

"We will not fight. There will be no more wars. Look at our planet. This was once a great world, full of ideas and art and invention. In one day it was destroyed. And you will never find one good reason why we should ever begin destroying everything again."
Alydon

The Doctor, however, isn't having any of it. The Thals are going to fight and he's going to lead them into battle. Won’t that be something, indeed.

This leads us right into the second question: is it right to enlist someone else to fight your battles? Even if your troubles have nothing to do with them?

The Doctor, for the record, couldn't care less if it's right or wrong. It's a matter of survival. If making the Thals fight will make them more likely to survive, then morality doesn’t come into the equation. Now, it shouldn’t surprise anyone that the Doctor would take this stance, but what about Barbara? Yes, of all people, Barbara takes his side. She never really struck me as a moral pragmatist before, but then again, it would surprise most people just how flexible morality can be when your life's on the line.

However, Ian thinks otherwise. Though eager earlier to get the Thals to fight, Ian has come to believe it would be wrong to force them to go against their nature, when this isn't even their battle. If the Thals are going to fight, it has to be for their own reasons.

How do you make a Thal fight? Threaten his loved ones, of course. When Ian threatens to take one of the Thals to the Daleks in exchange for the fluid link (one who is very special to Alydon, if you catch my meaning), it takes Alydon all of three seconds to send him flying.


For a man who’s never fought anyone in his life, Alydon can throw a heck of a punch.

Now, consider this: while all this debate has been raging, the Daleks have synthesised the Thals' anti-radiation drug with unexpected results: the drug is toxic to them. Why? Because it stops them absorbing radiation. This leads the Daleks to realise they need a radioactive environment to survive. If they're ever going to leave the city, they'll have to flood the planet with radiation. The Thals don't know it yet, but they're living on borrowed time.

Alydon comes to an important realisation while wrestling with his guilt over punching Ian. There may well be a just cause for fighting: in defence of another. If they don't help the companions, knowing that only their help can save them, they might as well just kill them themselves. It’s an interesting notion, and one that I find myself agreeing with. After all, all that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.

What's more, Alydon has himself come to the conclusion that the Daleks represent an ongoing threat to the Thals. They have all the food, and before long, the Thals are going to starve. The Thals are afraid, but that's okay. They're right to be afraid. But as Alydon puts it:

"There is no indignity in being afraid to die. But there is a terrible shame in being afraid to live."

In the end, a few Thals agree to go with Ian and Barbara, and they set out to infiltrate the city. However, it doesn't take long before they run into trouble.

This might be one of my favourite episodes of the serial. I really enjoyed the moral quandaries the characters found themselves in.


We have to have a bog monster in a bog, even if it doesn’t do anything. It’s the rules.

THE ORDEAL

This episode isn't as good as the ones sandwiching it. I'll say that before anything else. There's not really any of the moral philosophy, major character development (other than one rather nice Thal whose name I can't remember), or excitement of the other episodes, so I'll keep it brief.

In this episode, all of our players are getting into place for the final act. Ian and Barbara are leading an expedition of Thals to infiltrate the city from behind, and the Doctor and Susan are with the main group, plotting their own assault on the city. Meanwhile, the Daleks accelerate their plans to make the planet more suitable to their needs.

There are some rather nice, borderline flirty moments of banter between Barbara and one of the Thals travelling with her. It's a sweet little human thing that goes a long way towards endearing him to me. I just wonder how he ever learned of the Earth concept of 'ladies first'. Is that something that regularly comes up in conversation?

I also enjoyed the Doctor and Susan acting like a pair of gleeful schoolchildren as they sabotaged the Daleks' surveillance equipment—especially when the Doctor got so carried away with his own cleverness he forgot the most important part of any bit of mischief: run away afterwards.


You have to wonder how he’s survived as long as he has, really.

Towards the end of the episode, though, there's a scene which is a bit frustrating to watch, as once again, we run up against the budget limitations. It's rather hard to even see what's going on, harder still to believe that our heroes are clinging to the walls of a perilous ravine. Even an establishing shot of a matte painting would have gone a long way towards building my suspension of disbelief.

THE RESCUE

Here we are, at the grand finale. There's a lot going on in this episode, so let’s take a deep breath, and away we go!

Ian and Barbara make it to the city of the Daleks, as Susan and the Doctor find themselves once again at the mercy of the plunger-brandishing fiends. The Daleks kindly explain their whole evil plan, because that’s what baddies do. I’m sure there’s a Handy Guide To Being Evil out there somewhere that every villain ever written has read. Explaining your entire plan is rule number two. The first rule is to never just kill the hero when you have him at your mercy. That wouldn’t be any fun, now, would it?

By deliberately overloading their nuclear reactors, The Daleks will be able to release enough radioactive material to irradiate the atmosphere and terraform the planet to their needs. Or should that be skaroform?

As Alydon rallies his men to assault the city, the Doctor pleads with the Daleks to see reason. When he finds no sense of morality in them to appeal to, he even tries bargaining, but to no avail. Time is running out for the Doctor, and for the planet, when Ian and Barbara's party meets up with Alydon's group, and together, they make their assault on the Dalek command.

I can only really describe what happens as a… kerfuffle. Though the Daleks are deadly at a distance, in close quarters, they're no match for the strength and mobility of their attackers, who push them about as if they were shopping trolleys. It’s a bit funnier than I think was intended.

The Thals prevail, freeing the Doctor to put a stop to the Daleks' plan. However, the salvation of the Thals is achieved at the fatal expense of the Daleks. The reactors are fast draining of power entirely. When they're fully powered down, the Daleks will be starved for radiation. One Dalek, dying, begs for the Doctor to undo what he's done. But he can't. And even if he could, he wouldn't. The Dalek dies, and with it, it seems, the Dalek race itself.


Susan even got a snazzy new cloak.

So much for just being a wanderer throughout the universe, Doctor. You just single-handedly eradicated a sapient species. Neither he, nor any of the other characters for that matter, seem to appreciate that fact, and the episode breezes on to the dénouement, where lessons are learned, goodbyes are said, and cliffhangers for the next serial are set up. Oh, and Barbara and her Thal friend share a very special farewell.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Right, so when it comes down to it, what did I think of The Daleks?

We’re just two serials in, and The Doctor is already affecting events on a planetary scale! If he carries on the way he does, there'll be a Doctor-shaped trail of destruction across the universe before long.

The serial did start to meander a little bit in the middle with having to go back to the city. Particularly The Ordeal, which does set up the finale, but not much else. It's a tricky thing because I can't just point at a scene and say 'cut that'. It would require a surgeon’s finesse.

As for the Thals, I admit I did categorise them in my head as 'Alydon' and 'Not Alydon', which should give you an idea as to how invested I was in the Thals who weren't Alydon. I have forgotten all of their names. They're more of an ensemble cast than distinct individuals, so I didn't really blink when any of them died.

I'm a bit unsure about killing off all the Daleks. It seems a shame to get rid of an interesting villain, one so inhuman, for whom morals aren't a consideration when it comes to survival. An interesting foil for the Doctor, wouldn't you agree? Also, though the Daleks we saw were unquestionably evil and sowed the seeds of their own destruction, was that the case for all of them?

Then again, we never see anything to suggest a concept of individualism amongst the Daleks, so it could be argued that they all harboured the same genocidal ambitions, making peaceful coexistence with the Thals an impossibility. Still, there's no way of knowing either way, which is why I'd have liked to have seen some consideration of their fate.

I wonder if, as the Thals have basically bred into themselves the instinct for pacifism, the Daleks bred themselves to be the opposite. It would fit with all of their actions. When faced with a fight or flight situation, the Thals would always choose flight, and the Daleks would fight. I wonder how the Daleks kept on as long as they did without wiping themselves out. They think nothing of experimenting on or even killing their own kind, if it would further the ends of their leaders.

We do get one line from the Thals that could be interpreted as regretful, though that was probably more for the Thal losses than for the eradication of all Daleks. For that matter, for a bunch of people who had a complete taboo against violence, they did seem to take to it quite well in the end. You'd think the Thals might actually mourn the Daleks. That would have been quite curious to see from our perspective, but I think it would have made sense for a people who up to recently had been so dedicated to living in peace and harmony. Hopefully they won't end up regaining their ancient taste for war.

Still, a very exciting and enjoyable serial all the same. I know it's less educational, but then again, it did explore some moral philosophy on when it's right to fight, if ever, and I love that sort of thing. I also think it came to a responsible conclusion: avoid fighting, except in the defence of yourself or others. I can get behind that. The only time I ever got in a scrap as a child was when a boy was picking on my little brother. I didn't do much for fear of really hurting the bully, but he did back off. I would like to see a bit more that's less cut and dried, perhaps with factions that can’t be simply described as ‘good’ or ‘evil’. Because the real world is messy like that, and I do think that in itself is an important thing to teach.

I’ll be back very shortly for our next outing. Our companions made it safely back to the TARDIS, but it seems the TARDIS might not be the safest place to be after all…

4 out of 5 stars




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[January 24, 1964] In the Misty Regions of The Twilight Zone (Twilight Zone, Season 5, Episodes 13-16)

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by Natalie Devitt

This past month of The Twilight Zone has offered plenty of imaginative stories, including a ring that influences a young woman's actions, a car with a conscience, a couple grappling with the challenges of long term suspended animation, and a man suddenly discovering that he has the ability to trade circumstances with others. As you will see, the show’s tales of the fantastic still have substance and the ability to entertain.

Ring-a-Ding Girl, by Earl Hamner, Jr.

In Ring-a-Ding Girl, Oscar-nominated actress Maggie McNamara stars as Bunny Blake, a movie star who returns to her hometown of Howardsville after receiving an unusual ring. The piece of jewelry is a gift from the residents of Howardsville and was selected by her sister, Hildy. When Bunny gazes into the ring, she sees her sister begging her to "Come home." About to start filming a picture in Rome, but feeling compelled to see her sister, Bunny stops in Howardsville to pay a visit to Hildy and Hildy’s son, Bud.

Bunny plans to stay in town for just one day, but her visit falls on the same day as a city picnic, which most residents plan to attend. Bunny begins seeing images of the local family doctor inside the gemstone of her ring. Suddenly, Bunny starts to feel ill, so the family calls for the doctor to visit the house. While there, Bunny asks the doctor, who also helps organize the event, to postpone the picnic. He brushes off her request as presumptuous; "This isn’t Hollywood," he says. The doctor then encourages her to relax, because he thinks she is "under a strain."

Still receiving premonitions from her ring, she disobeys the doctor’s orders. Bunny continues to see familiar faces almost every time she stares into her new jewelry. Determined to visit everybody she sees in her ring, she asks her nephew to drive her around town. The actress even stops by the local television station to see an old friend, who is now employed there. Bunny goes on-air to make an announcement: she has plans to put on a performance that will occur at the same exact time as the picnic, forcing those in Howardsville to choose between the two and leaving her family puzzled by her behavior.

Ring-a-Ding Girl takes a while to really get going. It probably does not help that Bunny is not the easiest character to tolerate, exclaiming, “I’m a star,” and otherwise seeming insufferable. But Ring-a-Ding Girl is worth sticking it out for because things really come together nicely at the end. In addition to the strong conclusion, I enjoyed the musical score, which includes cues with a theremin that plays every time Bunny looks into her ring, accompanying the swirl of clouds that then part to reveal the image of someone from her past. The episode earns a pretty solid three stars.

You Drive, by Earl Hamner, Jr.

Oliver Pope is, as Rod Serling’s opening monologue states, a “businessman turned killer” in You Drive. After hitting a paperboy with his car, Oliver flees the scene. Not long after the incident, the headlights of his car start blinking on and off for no apparent reason. Then, his horn begins honking at random. But even after disabling the horn, it continues to honk. Oliver’s wife, Lillian, grows concerned, while he tries to convince her that the problems are just a sign that the car is getting old.

His wife takes it upon herself to take the car to the shop, but once she is behind the wheel, the car takes her to where the paperboy was struck, before suddenly breaking down and forcing Lillian to call for help. Once the car finally makes it to the repair shop, it mysteriously reappears in the Popes’ garage. When Oliver and Lillian contact the mechanic, they are told their car simply disappeared.

Shortly after, Oliver is visited by a co-worker by the name of Pete Radcliff, who after discussing work, informs them that the paperboy has succumbed to his injuries. Pete is later accused of being the driver in the deadly hit-and-run after an incorrect tip. But even with the police thinking they have their suspect, Oliver still has plenty to worry about.

I really enjoyed the plot of You Drive, but my biggest complaint about this episode is not the writing as much as the casting. While I like character actor Edward Andrews, he sometimes seems a bit awkward in the role of Pope. Then there is the supposedly 12 year old paperboy, who looks like he is probably closer to 20. Having said all of that, I did enjoy You Drive, which is why I feel it deserves three stars.

The Long Morrow, by Rod Serling

The Long Morrow is the story of Commander Douglass Stansfield, an astronaut. In the role of Douglass is Robert Lansing, the charismatic star of the previously reviewed 4-D Man. Douglass has been selected to go on an expedition to a star 141 light-years and 40 traveling years away. Unaware that his life would change dramatically before the expedition, he agrees to do it. But right before he is scheduled to depart, Douglass meets and falls hard for Mariette Hartley’s character, Sandra Horn. They go on a date that night, during which they confess their love for one another.

Douglass, who is currently 31, is told by his employer that when he returns from his voyage that “the Earth will have aged, but you will not.“ Sandra, at age 26, tells him that she is willing to wait for his return. The only problem is that she will grow older all through his journey. When he arrives from his expedition, she will be “the little old lady in the lace shawl. The one waving the welcome home sign.” It probably should come as no surprise that things do not go exactly as the couple plans.

If you are willing to believe that the two characters fall in love as quickly as they do, this is a pretty enjoyable episode. The lead actors are quite good in their roles. Also, while it is not too hard to predict what becomes of the characters, it almost does not matter because the episode has an almost hypnotic quality to it, and it gives you the feeling that you will enjoy it no matter what happens. One big distraction to the story, though, is the special effects makeup, which is too heavy. The wrinkles used to convey age are incredibly dark and the product used to whiten hair is so thick that it appears to have the consistency of toothpaste. Overall, I give The Long Morrow three stars.

The Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross, by Jerry McNeely

Don Gordon, who appeared in The Twilight Zone’s The Four of Us Are Dying, plays the abrasive title character in this adaptation of Henry Slesar's story [which I pegged as Zoney back then (Ed.)]. Don Siegel returns to the series as the episode's director. Salvadore is a man who has his eyes set on one woman, a social worker named Leah, played by television actress Gail Kobe. She’s already broken up with him, but Salvadore believes that he can win her back. “I ain’t always going to have dirt on my hands. I don’t need no books to show me which way is up. I got the map and I’ll get there,” he says.

Salvadore soon discovers that he has the ability to trade circumstances with others. He offers a wealthy older man his youth in exchange for the old man’s money. With that, he buys everything he wants, including his youth back. Now, young and rich he thinks he has a good shot at winning Leah back.

The Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross is probably my least favorite entry this month. While I do not mind an episode that does not try to explain absolutely everything, I must admit that I am a little curious about how Salvadore ended up with his magical ability to switch situations with others. The acting is decent, but the script leaves more to be desired. One thing that this episode has going for it is that it has slightly better special effects makeup than The Long Morrow. Two and a half stars is about all that I can give to the month’s weakest offering.

Signing Off

The most recent episodes of The Twilight Zone have been mostly enjoyable. The only exception being The The Self-Improvement of Salvadore Ross. While the show is still capable of producing some creative and thought-provoking episodes, it failed to present anything truly outstanding. Perhaps The Twilight Zone, itself, has reached its twilight…

(Did you read about all the ways the Journey expanded last year? Catch up and see what you missed!)



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[January 16, 1964] Man’s Dark and Troubled History (The Outer Limits, Season 1, Episodes 13-16)

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by Natalie Devitt

This past month on The Outer Limits has been a meditation on man’s past actions and his darker qualities. Over the course of the month, I watched men motivated by greed, aliens target Earth specifically because of their negative perception of people, scientists treat their fellow men like nothing more than laboratory animals, and Martians try to figure out what motivates human beings to kill one another.

Tourist Attraction, by Dean Riesner

While aboard his yacht in South America, millionaire and United States citizen John Dexter, portrayed by Kiss Me Deadly’s Ralph Meeker, captures a fish that is larger than your average fish. In addition to its massive size, one of the men aboard his yacht observes that it “has hands and feet.” Dexter soon finds out that the animal’s extremities are not the only thing special about the creature and that the locals have legends about it.

The fish is frozen and taken to a local university for research, where it thaws out and almost escapes. Hungry for fame, Dexter makes arrangements to bring the being with him when he returns to the states. The only thing that stands in his way is General Juan Mercurio, the dictator of the country. Mercurio is played by Ocean 11’s Henry Silva, and he plans to make the fish part of an exhibit at the World’s Fair, in hopes of boosting the country’s dwindling tourism industry.

One thing that sets Tourist Attraction apart from previous entries in the series is its frequent use of narration. The average episode of The Outer Limits only uses a narrator for the opening and closing monologue, but Tourist Attraction uses it off and on throughout the story, which is frustrating because it does not seem to add much. If anything, the narrator can be a bit distracting, especially since he disappears for a while, just to start again suddenly.

One other downside to the episode is that it is hard to watch Tourist Attraction and not think that it may be a little too heavily influenced by Creature from the Black Lagoon and the two sequels that followed. Even with all the things counting against this episode, for some reason I found myself entertained. It is not nearly as sophisticated or as artistically ambitious as something like last month's Nightmare, but it is enjoyable, and would probably not be out of place as the B movie in a double feature. Tourist Attraction earns three stars from me.

The Zanti Misfits, by Joseph Stefano

The Zanti Misfits takes place in a ghost town in California. Professor Steven Graves, a “historian of interplanetary events”, performed by television actor Michael Tolan, goes to observe a penal ship from the planet of Zanti land in what is supposed to be a “non-hostile sequence.”

The Zanti have an agreement with the United States government, where the government allows the aliens to land their spacecraft in the deserted town and use it as “a place of exile for their criminals and misfits.” If the government does not properly secure the area and maintain their privacy, the extraterrestrials vow “total destruction.”

As luck would have it, the aliens are in the process of landing their spaceship when the Zanti spot a couple, played by Bruce Dern and Olive Deering. The couple are fleeing the scene of a crime and have driven into the restricted area. Thinking their privacy was been invaded, the Zanti are determined to make sure there were no witnesses to their landing, and later reveal a surprising reason for picking Earth for their colony, which is that they view humans as “practiced executioners.”

This episode's creatures are certainly memorable, with their ant-like bodies and faces that look all too human. As interesting as the Zantis look, the episode’s greatest strength aside from the story, is probably its use of stop-motion animation, which is best captured in a sequence where the Zanti chase after Olive Deering’s character, Lisa. The entire thing is shot in broad daylight, but the stop motion combined with buzzing sounds of the Zanti make it enough to give anyone nightmares. All in all, this episode is the standout of the month, which is why it earns four stars.

The Mice, by Bill S. Ballinger and Joseph Stefano

Henry Silva returns for a second trip to The Outer Limits this month. In The Mice, he plays a convict named Chino Rivera, who volunteers to be a test subject in an experiment. In the experiment, Rivera will teleported to the planet of Chromo. In exchange, Chromo will send one of their beings. When Chromo transmits one of their inhabitants, the scientists encounter a being infinitely more dangerous than Rivera.

Tourist Attraction did not do much to showcase Silva’s talent as an actor, but The Mice certainly does. Silva makes a convicted murder the most likable character in the whole story, even when the other characters do not treat him with the respect he deserves and he has to remind them that he is person, just like them.

What would The Outer Limits be without the crazy monsters and aliens? The Mice certainly delivers one of the strangest monsters I have seen yet, one that resembles a glob of mucus. Also, like most episodes of the series, it does not hurt that the episode is beautifully filmed. The Mice receives three and a half stars from me.

Controlled Experiment, by Leslie Stevens

Carrol O'Connor and Barry Morse star as two Martians in Controlled Experiment. Barry Morse, who most Twilight Zone fans will recognize from A Piano in the House plays Phobos One, an alien who enlists the help of television actor Carrol O'Connor's character, Deimos, to understand the "process of Earth creatures destroying each other." Shortly before a murder in committed, their fellow Martians inform them of the time and location. Once they receive the information, Phobos One and Deimos bring a machine that helps them manipulate time and rush to a local hotel lobby, where they wait for the murder to take place.

As the Martians play with their devise and change time, a number of special effects are utilized. There are times that the images on screen resemble film negatives. Other times, images come into and out of focus. The men from Mars freeze time and replay events that have already occurred. When events are replayed, sometimes they are in slow motion, while other times things are sped up. Controlled Experiment is similar to the previous episode Borderlands, because it does not have the strongest story but it often looks fantastic.

The whole thing felt a bit long to stretch out for a full hour, especially since the Martians replay the same event over and over. It works for a while, but then starts to wear thin. One thing worth noting is that this episode marks the show’s first foray into comedy, even if it is making light of a serious issue. Due to its visual achievements, it is better than The Twilight Zone's attempts at humor, but it is far from the most memorable entry of The Outer Limits. I can only give Controlled Experiment two and a half stars, which are primarily for its special effects and cinematography.

As dark as The Outer Limits has been recently, it has been mostly rewarding to watch and it has expressed hope for a brighter future. To wit: the closing monologue to The Mice, which states, “Wouldn’t it seem that the misery known and understood by all men would lead Man not to deception and murder, but to faith, and hope and love?”

(Did you read about all the ways the Journey expanded last year? Catch up and see what you missed!)



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