by Mx. Kris Vyas-Myall
Whilst the comedy double act has been popular since the days of music hall, they seem to be having a moment on British Television.
Eric Morecambe and Ernie Wise are probably the biggest draw, with their ATV series Two of a Kind being more widely known simply as Morecambe and Wise.
Whilst the BBC’s primary double act are Mike and Bernie Winters who have just concluded Blackpool Night Out and we will soon be getting The Mike and Bernie Show.
There are, however, others coming up as well. In particular, the irreverent Peter Cook and Dudley Moore are currently in the second season of Not Only… But Also, which has been getting great acclaim, as well as a strong following among younger viewers.
The format tends to work on having a funny man and a straight man, in order to play off against each other. The books from two British Veterans I picked up looked like they could be their own comedic duo, however they might end up getting booed off the stage:
The Not-so Funny Man:
The Richest Corpse in Show Business by Dan Morgan
The outside of this books gives next to no detail about the plot. The Keith Roberts cover sketch of a bearded man gives nothing away. Instead, we get a warning notice on the front:
WARNING! Earnest students of SCIENCE FICTION who deprecate hilarity on the subject should avoid this book like the plague.
Is this a marketing ploy? Absolutely! But an intriguing enough one to catch my attention.
At the same time Dan Morgan had always been one of the stronger of Carnell’s set but he is also much less prolific than many of his counterparts. As such I usually look forward to whenever he finally does publish something.
So, what would Mr. Morgan be writing? Perhaps a madcap adventure, like a cross between Jerry Cornelius and Bill the Galactic Hero? A comedy about a zombie who becomes a pop star? Disappointingly the whole affair is rather more pedestrian.
It tells of Harry Trevey, the producer of Just Folks at Amalgamated Tel. This seems to be a kind of documentary show following real-life subjects throughout their entire lives. This is an incredibly important part of Amalgamated Tel’s line-up as there is currently a long-fought and bitter actors' strike going on, meaning that scripted programming is not available.
At the start the terrible news emerges that their current star, door-to-door salesman Carmody Truelove has died of a heart attack. However, the biggest initial concern is he died off-camera, and no one seems to know him well enough to try to do a memorial show afterwards. Now, Carmody would appear to be the titular “Richest Corpse” and it would seem that the story was going to be about finding out his past. But this plot turns out to be only so much pre-amble for the main story and frustratingly just fizzles out about a third of the way through the book.
It turns out the meat of the story is actually about what will fill Just Folks after Truelove’s demise. They decide to use a hunter (the fellow pictured on the cover), who has a licence to hunt down humans and get him to announce his next victim on the show. Things finally appear to be going Trevey’s way until he is selected as the victim and has to fight for his life against one of the most skilled killers in the world. He will be paid incredibly well, though, for being the star of the series, making him The Richest Corpse in Show Business.
Anyone who has read Robert Sheckley’s Seventh Victim will probably recognise this plot. Morgan does attempt to put his own spin on it by using it to skewer the media’s desire for increasingly sensational content (also demonstrated by the character of Dick Gordon, who is trying to setup his own network of pornographic stations) but it is all done very bluntly and clumsily.
It also doesn’t help much that everyone in it is very unpleasant, although Trevey himself most of all. At one point he even attempts to rape the main love interest. This happens for no good reason I can fathom other than to justify the claim on the back that it contains a:
…a deliciously amoral line in sex…
I know there are still some fans that like this kind of thing. For example, John Christopher’s much praised Death of Grass features a gratuitous rape scene that seem to be there mainly to show how bad the world is. Or in Robert A. Heinlein’s Let There Be Light the protagonist forces a women into a literal shotgun wedding.
William F. Temple wrote an editorial in New Worlds saying that having women in SF stories directly was the problem:
Bring women into it, and they gum up the works.
The solution, as I see it, is to try one’s best to leave women, as characters, out of the plot if possible.
I would disagree with both of these sentiments. The issue with the women in The Richest Corpse is not that they are present; it is the fact that Morgan writes them in cliches and uses them as tools for Trevey’s story, instead of showing them as people in their own right. Even Isaac Asimov (who is infamous in fan circles for his treatment of women) managed to create the wonderful Susan Calvin. If people like Mr. Morgan are scratching their head, why not just try talking to a woman and asking her opinion on a scene? Even if you lack female friends or work colleagues, maybe you have a wife, a mother or a sister you could go visit and listen to?
But, perhaps, the biggest issue is I simply didn’t find it funny. From everything involved in the promotion of the book I expected it to be a laugh fest but it doesn’t even appear to be written as such. Maybe it could be said to try to raise a smile, like The Midas Plague, but even in this aspect it doesn’t really achieve its goal.
Overall, it is just a mid-level satire of the entertainment industry. Not truly terrible but certainly not destined to be the next Space Merchants either.
Two Stars
The Wobbly Straight Man:
The Crystal World by J. G. Ballard
This story may be familiar to SFF magazine readers as this was previously published as Equinox in New Worlds in 1964.
Although, confusingly, the second part of the Equinox serial from New Worlds is named The Illuminated Man in the book format, which is the name of a similar story in F&SF in the same month, also about a petrified forest and likely set in the same world. This has led some people to conclude this is actually a fix-up story. However, this is not the case as far as I can tell.
Putting them side by side my copy appears to just be an expanded version of Equinox. Specifically, with additional conversations throughout and two new chapters:
Chapter Three – Mulatto on the Catwalk: A chase scene in Port Montarre.
Chapter Eleven – The White Hotel: Whilst staying in the chalet they become acquainted with an abandoned hotel and former leper colony.
I would not be surprised if these were simply excised for space from the New Worlds version as neither add anything more to the conclusion of the tale.
The Crystal World seems to be part of his continued look at elemental catastrophes. We had air in The Wind From Nowhere, water in The Drowned World and fire in The Drought, so it makes sense to complete the set with an earth based catastrophe (or crystalline at the very least).
These seem to be somewhat in vogue right now, as Disch’s debut novel The Genocides is about a tree-based apocalypse and Aldiss’ Earthworks is about an environmentally damaged Earth. Is it a sign of increasing environmental awareness since The Silent Spring was published? Or does the New Wave just not like nature?
Anyway, the text itself. As those of you who read the New Worlds serial or Mark’s excellent write ups will probably recall it concerns Dr. Sanders and his running around a crystalline landscape near Mont Royale getting into various scrapes and lots of discussing what it is all about. In less skilled hands this could be a terrible book. But as this is Ballard, he manages to pull this one off…just.
Predominantly this is because this is not so much a book about ideas and events as one about atmosphere. The mystery of why the jungle is crystallizing and the gun toting antics are not why you should read. Rather it is for the dream-like and magical feeling you get as you go through this environment, along with the word-for-word quality of Ballard’s writing. For example:
In a few places the affected zone had crossed the highway, and small patches of the scrub along the roadside had begun to vitrify. Their drab leaves gave off a faint luminescence. Suzanne walked among them, her long robe sweeping across the brittle ground. Sanders could see that her shoes and the train of her robe were beginning to crystallize, the minute prisms glancing in the moonlight.
Few other writers can create an atmosphere as beautiful and written with such style as J. G. Ballard and it is why he remains a master of the field.
We have to address the big elephant in the room when it comes to this story, colonialism. Ballard seems to have taken a lot of influence from Conrad’s Heart of Darkness. However, he is taking on many of the mistakes Chinua Achebe critiqued in his modern classic Things Fall Apart.
The African characters seem to be treated as incidental to what is happening and throughout rarely even have names, referred to instead with terms such as “The Mulatto” “The Negro” or “Natives”.
I don’t think it is beyond the scope or capability of contemporary western science fiction writers to address these kinds of themes with more thoughtfulness. After all, they are able to handle making critiques of colonialism through extra-terrestrial cultures, such as in Aldiss’ The Dark Light Years or MacLean’s Unhuman Sacrifice. So how about we make sure to use the same care and attention when writing about real people on our own planet?
Overall, I think that this is a readable but flawed and unnecessary publication. It is still better than a lot of science fiction out there, but one I would only recommend for Ballard completists.
Three Stars
